Room 101: Adverts

So I was looking through all my past emails in a futile attempt to find my uncles email address, and during my search I found all the email I ever sent and the list goes back to 2008.

For shits and giggles I decided to look through some of the things I sent, and besides a plethora of viruses my email address sent out in 2010 and some embarrassing emails I sent to my friends of jokes I had just copied and pasted from the internet with the subject LOLZ!!!  I found an email I sent to a teacher it was a piece of homework called Room 101

Now I'm sure you are all familiar with the concept of Room 101, but for those of you who are unfamiliar I took the liberty of pasting the first sentence of a Wikipedia article for you
 

Room 101 is a place introduced in the novel Nineteen Eighty-Four by George Orwell. It is a torture chamber in the Ministry of Love in which the Party attempts to subject a prisoner to his or her own worst nightmare, fear or phobia.

“ You asked me once, what was in Room 101. I told you that you knew the answer already. Everyone knows it. The thing that is in Room 101 is the worst thing in the world. ” — O'Brien

So our teacher (who although it holds no relevance to anything, I thought I might as well tell you was blind) got us to write a page on the thing we hate most and why we would send it to room 101,  this is my page, I also thought I should tell you the fact I had to email it her means I did not complete it in the lesson, probably because I was to busy trying to catch up on work I didn't do for the next lesson. (most likely History, which I got a D in overall... I wonder why?)

Anyway on with the thing.

Room 101: Adverts

Do you enjoy being reminded to go compare, by a ridiculously irritating opera singer with the power of his extremely annoying voice which alone can shake tables and then he floats above cars whilst trying to convince you to change your car insurance? Or being bullied to sell your phone by a combination of the world ugliest people that look like they have just been herded off the street this advert is shocking on so many levels with the perfect recipe for a truly terrifyingly advert, a welsh accent, a man with a giant Mohican, and a man that shouts Wonga at you, then to top it all off the man with the giant Mohican that looks like he could impale you says cooull it an accent that is like no other on this planet.

I hate adverts so much because, adverts now are made to be more annoying so that you remember them more easily and they are 25% louder than the shows on TV, so that even if you have left the room you can still here the annoying attempt at rapping the words, we buy any car or one of the hundreds of ads telling you to sell your gold at cash your gold or cash 4 gold or cash I don’t care. Personally one of my biggest dreams in the world is to outlive the DFS sale but I think that when the world ends all that will be left is cockroaches and the DFS sale.

I keep having this dream that all the most annoying adverts people will have some kind of showdown or battle to the death, starting with a fight between Wonga man and go compare guy, then Mohican man comes charging in and tries to impale his enemies, then we buy any car rapper comes and tries to bust some moves but fails, suddenly all the gold grabbers capture you in there handy pre paid envelops but like I said in the end the DFS sale wins because it can’t die.

I wish all these adverts and more could be put in room 101 we lock the door and then we sell the key to cash your gold. 

So that was what I wrote please bear in mind at the time this was written all these adverts were relevant and my humour was cutting edge (obviously). Also side note I only got a C for this (my teacher did not appreciate my humour, but like many great people I will get my recognition in the end)

Here are links to some of the adverts mentioned in my post
Go compare - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F_-9QFvhQWo
Envirofone - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0sJW0LKXeOE
We Buy Any Car - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MXiJBp7HK5o