eavesdropping

Ok so tonight I want to talk about eavesdropping. Sorry what’s that I hear you ask “why Bridie have you decided to talk about eavesdropping?” well my simple reader I will tell you why and like any good writer I will tell a tale with my words and create beautiful word pictures in the space between your ears.  But like and good modern film writer I will start in the middle loopback to the start and then finish thoroughly confusing the shit out of you and then you have to Google what the fuck that was all about so you don’t seem stupid.

Well let’s begin the idea came to me on a busy Saturday afternoon this afternoon to be exact I was rushing through the streets of Brighton with my two sisters well I say that like we were all rushing but one of my sisters is only 7 months old so she just sat in a pushchair while the rest of us walked (lazy bitch) anyway back to the point I was frantically searching (being dragged by my mother around shops against my will) for a present for father’s day and my brothers birthday (same day) and during one of the treks from boring shop to boring shop I overheard to men talking the first man was short and poorly dressed in scruffy grey trousers and a red shirt while the other was in a navy suit (just kidding I didn’t pay attention to what they were wearing I just wanted to add some description) anyway I only caught a snippet of the conversation but the following is an (almost) exact transcript of what I heard. the shorter man laugh snorted and then said so anyway I whacked two johnnies on the counter and said sorry for the wait mate but I been kinda busy then this bloke literally exploded with laughter.

 (to be honest I don’t think he knows what literally means) anyway after the initial reaction of general moronatude I felt for the things this man just said it also started me thinking about listening in on peoples conversations which eventually lead to the old fashioned steam train of thought in my mind going about childhood(old school bitches) and spies because when I little I wanted to be a spy I even had the spy headphones and receiver and a recorder spy pen that I played with for a while until everyone knew what the spy toys looked like and then wouldn’t do anything until I put the spy stuff away(clearly subtlety wasn’t my strong suit at the time) but I also used to love spy films like spy kids 1,2 and 3 and Cody banks 1 and 2 mainly not because I lived for danger as a child and wanted to be the sole responsibly of saving the planet (trust me I would crumble like pastry in any high pressure situation) but I thought that were cool because I thought how convenient it would be to have all those cool gadgets in everyday situations so really what I'm saying is I want to be and evil genius and take over the world. The end.

(remember first vlog tomorrow)