Procrastinating (this took me 2 days)

Ok guys/girls/tiff.

I’ve been away for a few days, that is no reason to start writing crazy things. Ok I got more letters today (completely real and not fictitious) from someone *cough* Tiff *cough* but rather than go on about it I will just show you what was written.

Dear Bridie,

I have very mixed feelings about your response to my letter the other day on the one hand I am happy to know that you are reading my letters and my stalking (and that whole incident when I broke in to your house) hasn’t put you off. But on the other hand I feel that you seem to have a very negative reaction to my affection and your advice about my blog was very blunt but I appreciate it. Well I would just like to say that I am receiving counselling for my addiction to you and I realise that taking your nan was wrong, so I am sending her back almost as good as new (2^nd class though) so it might be a bit of a wait but don’t worry I got her some magazines so it’s cool.

But in exchange for your Nan I have decided we need to get married so I picked a date (my birthday) you should know when that is and I thought to make it easier on you travel wise it’s at your house (I mean I will be there anyway).

P.S. my parents really wanna meet you.

Love tiff

xxx

Umm well I am still frightened to be honest so I can’t write a response to that right now.

But I have received a letter that I want to talk about.

Dear Bridie

I hate your blog, it is awful and not nearly as good as mine. I hate you and your readers. Stop writing now (or you might get hurt).  I also hate lists they are awful for the following reasons

1.        They are overused.  Everyone does Lists nowadays.

2.     The subjects of the lists are usually dumb.  But mine aren’t. 

3.     According Jesus lists are a tool of the Devil.

4.    People who write them are avoiding actually writing a stimulating article on the subject.

5.     You want people to think that these lists are concise and fun ways to get a point across, but they’re not!

6.     Lists are stupid

I will find you and stop you and your blog one day.

Eidirb

Well Eidirb for a start your name sounds a bit backwards to me and I am sick of people saying my lists are stupid they are amazing and a super fun way to organize (and who doesn’t love organization)

Reasons why lists are awesome

1.       You get to check items off of them.  (get a sense of accomplishment motherfucker)

2.       They are easier to read than a paragraph. (I'm lazy bitches)

3.       They can be short or long. (I fucked your mum)

4.       They Are Inspiring. (I'm an inspirational ginger Jesus)

5.       They are Easy to Understand. (you are all stupid, my fans probably consist of two people so why confuse you)

(by the way to all my readers i will be writing regular entries during the week and vlog on sundays!)